Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Word of the Week....Amazingness

Amazingess is the word of the week. Yes, I know that's not a word. If you know me, then you already know I'm brilliant. That means I can make up a word if I want to. And amazingness is the only word that captures the week. One important element of the word amazing is that it can apply to both positive and negative, and I have both. Not all of them happened directly to me, but they happened to people I'm tied to, which is pretty much the same thing as happening to me. I'll start with the three negatives, that way we don't end on a sour note.

1. My sister is a high school teacher. I won't say where because I don't want you to know where the criminal belongs to. She just got a new car. Not just any new car. A freakin Mercedes Benz. What happens when she drives it to school and parks? Someone hits it. Hits it and then drives away. They don't have designated teacher or student lots at this school, nor do they have assigned spots or cameras. So it means she will never know what idiot 16-year-old hit it and drove off. Nice. Amazingness.

2. I finally got to announce Baby Payne on Facebook and Twitter. Lots of people were really sweet and congratulated us. Amazingness. Sadly, a lot of people that I thought would say something, in fact, didn't seem to care. Lesson learned - don't expect people to wish you well just because you've wished them well and sent them a present every time they sent you an invitation for some life event. Yep, they don't deserve my word of the week. (Sorry, take it back to the previous blog post. Just keeping it real.)

3. My beautiful (and newly engaged) friend M.W. was in a less than stellar car accident two weeks ago. She and the bling are fine, but her car was totaled. I've been listening to her on the phone for two weeks now trying to get the perp's insurance to take care of her. They tried to only give her a rental care for like 2 days, and then tried to undercut the price on her car by a ton of $$. Unbelievable amazingness. But the really amazing part was listening to her side of the conversation. Homegirl did not back down. She absolutely took control and made them her b**ch. Now she gets to buy a new car. I would have totally buckled. SHE was amazingness.

4. I made it through one whole night without waking up to go to the bathroom. Absolute amazingness.

5. My wonderful, agreeable husband let me buy all new stainless steel appliances for my kitchen. Amazingness.  The new stove has a griddle. Have you ever wanted a cheese quesadilla at 10:30 p.m.? Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Life just got easier.

6. My wonderful dad came and installed ALL OF THEM so that I wouldn't have to pay someone else to do it. He and my mom took them back to Alabama to sell them for me. Double amazingness.

7. As I type this entry, my friend and former colleague A.D. is getting to know her brand new son. Her husband checked in on Facebook at midnight, and later compared her to Chuck Norris. Baby A.H.D was born at 3 p.m today....on his actual due date. How is that for amazingness?

8. Group trip to Carvel at 4 p.m. one day this week. Ummm....what is that if not amazingness?  Oh, and the cafe at work is now serving Jim and Nick's BBQ. My pregnant belly was much obliged.

9. This is for that beautiful and newly engaged friend M.W. (soon to be M.A.) that I was telling you about. She discovered this video this week, so I feel compelled to share it with you. She rolls every time it plays. I'm still partial to the Oregon Duck, but I've learned not to mess with her. Amazingness is the angry goat

10. My beautiful friend N.C., who is now 8 months pregnant, has been putting my hand on her round belly for months. Of course, it's only when Baby kicks. Not because she likes being rubbed on or anything. But, every time my hand goes up, he stops. Until today. She came running into my office, grabbed my hand and put it on her belly. He had the hiccups, and I could feel every little bounce he made. It's the first time I've felt truly overwhelmed about what's happening with me. Ultrasounds and heartbeats are amazing. But feeling it is something else entirely. That was utter and complete amazingness.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Gretel...Take 2

We had our second ultrasound on Wednesday. Gretel is measuring right on target to be here Feb. 27. It's actually starting to look more like a baby. The nurse had to measure the nuchal translucency (it's for a test to determine the probability of the baby being born with Down's Syndrome), and in order to do that, the nurse needed the baby to lift up a little bit. Apparently, she was sleepy and stubborn, because she was having none of it. The nurse made me cough a bunch of times, and she even resorted to pushing on my belly repeatedly. Gretel didn't care. She would raise up a little bit, and then snuggle back down into her nook. No doubt at all...that is my child.

Gretel/Seven at 12 weeks 3 days. The dark circle in the middle of her head is her ear. (And no, I don't know if it's a her yet, but even before he/she existed I called it a her, so I figure I might as well keep calling it a least until Sept. 29.)

We find out on Sept. 29 if I can keep using the name Gretel, or if I have to switch to Seven and paint the pink room blue. Ahhh probably didn't know that. Kiddo's room is already pink. When we bought our house in April 2009, one of the four bedrooms was light pink. I immediately designated it as the future nursery. We knew when we wanted to bring Gretel home, so I decided to leave it that way, just in case. I thought it was a nice sign, but now I'm not so sure. I have a feeling that the pink room will be getting doused in blue (or another boy-friendly color) soon.

Which brings about another topic...boy or girl? I've always wanted a girl, but now that Gretel is on the way, I honestly don't care. I always thought it was a cop-out when people said that, but's true. Go figure. I want one of each anyhow, so the order doesn't matter much. Although, I've always heard boys are easier, so a boy might be better for the first round. A girl might should wait until we're more advanced.  Now don't get me wrong, I would still love to buy a pink Burberry bathing suit and matching hat, but I would love to buy Chuck Taylors and a Red Hot Chili Peppers onesie too:)

Since it's Friday, I'm leaving you with one of my favorite YouTube videos that has nothing to do with babies. If nothing else, it's a reminder that fall is around the corner. Without further ado...the Oregon Duck kicks the Houston Cougar's butt:

Monday, August 16, 2010

Let's keep it real, shall we?

Let me begin by saying how incredibly grateful and blessed I feel to even be in this position. I can't put into words how excited I am about Gretel/Seven's arrival in 6 months.  I am exactly where I want to be. I planned and timed everything out exactly like I wanted it to be, and it actually worked out that way. BUT, that's not what you always want to read about, is it? Hey, I'm in PR. I know what sells. So, in addition to the fluffy things, I would like to "keep it real." In honor of keeping it real, I'm going to share with you five of the less-than-glamorous aspects of my pregnancy thus far. (Also, these WILL get shorter. You're just so far behind that there is much to catch you up on.)

1. I drink a lot of Gatorade. A lot. Not kidding. My refrigerator looks like I'm training for the Tour de France. After I was sick for so long, there aren't many things I can stand to drink. Ginger Ale, Sprite and any other caffeine-free soda makes me gag, and Gatorade seemed to stick with me. Let me put it this way. For the last 3-4 weeks, I've spent about $100 a week on the stuff. Yeah. You're welcome, Publix.

2. I burp. A lot. I'm a girly girl to the 10th power. I hate dirt, bugs, sweat, body functions and general ickiness. So the fact that I went from never burping (especially out loud) to not being able to control it is unacceptable. I think the husband thought it was funny at first. Now I think he is getting grossed out. Most of the time, they are dainty. I go to speak, and a small, funny noise comes out. Other times...well, you know that scene from "Elf" when Buddy downed a 2-liter Coke and then proceeded to rattle the wall hangings. Yep. This girl. I can't believe I admitted it, but hey, we're keeping it real.

3. I can't button a single pair of pants that I own. When I told my mother, she thought it would be helpful to tell me that she didn't have to wear maternity pants until she was 7 months pregnant. Gee. Thanks. Isn't there someone in Alabama that needs a pep talk?

4. Apparently as your uterus grows, your bladder shrinks. Not really, but it feels that way. I wake up in the middle of the night at least once (EVERY NIGHT) because, I'm certain, Gretel/Seven (who is only the size of a peach right now) is kicking my bladder with all of her/his might. It makes car rides very, very long.

5. Ok, so I will only share four things. I don't want to be totally negative, so I will share Gretel/Seven's first picture. I think that "keeping it real" also requires a reminder of just how incredible this whole thing is. This was at 8 weeks, when she was only 17 millimeters long. Now she is about 3 inches long, or the size of a peach. Half of that is her head, but I've been reassured that she should even out by the time she gets here.

In the first image, you can see where his/her brain is developing. She's standing on her head, basically, and the dark circle is her brain. In the other pictures, the ring is the yolk sac, but the nurse said it looks like she has a halo. Was there ever any doubt that my child (and Kyle's) would be an angel with a big brain? I don't see any hands going up. If you look at the circle, the go to the right, you will see her head, arms and legs.  Pretty cool, huh? My second ultrasound is on Wednesday, so I will hopefully have a new picture to post.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Where to begin...

Two posts in a row. That's right. Don't get used to it. Right now, I'm on a roll. And football is on, so I don't have much else to do. Onward and upward. Now that I've shared with you why I started this little blog, I should probably go back a little bit. You are, after all, about 3 months behind. How about I just start with a few things that might help to know? For background info and future posts...

If you read my first post, then you know that Kyle and I are expecting kiddo numero uno. Feb. 27 is the date, which makes me 3 months along right now. And no, next year is not a leap year. That's the first thing I asked, though. We've already told our families and a handful of friends. I had to tell my work girls a few weeks earlier than planned because Gretel (the in utero name I have given kiddo - despite not knowing the gender) had me nauseous all day long for about 6 weeks. When you no longer eat during the day, the group of girls you devour cheese dip with weekly are going to notice (BTW - you can't eat queso when you're pregnant, but that's a different post for a different day). And yeah, the idiot that came up with the term "morning sickness" was either a dude or part of a conspiracy to keep women pregnant, not fully revealing to them that vomiting throughout the day for weeks was a possibility. It is, is.

My plan was to wait another couple of days before telling anyone else, but I broke weak and started telling more people at work today. I actually only told two people, but they told two people, and they told two get the point. When I got dressed for work this morning and looked like I had stuck a cantaloupe under my shirt, I decided it was time. Which is a nice transition to...

Maternity pants. Dude. They are freaking awesome. I held out as long as I could because part of me wasn't ready. I was missing out! They are like wearing yoga pants at top and trousers at the bottom. A-MAZING. I want to wear them forever. I went around work with my pants unbuttoned for a few weeks, which afforded my group a few laughs. But maternity pants are waaaayyy better. Sorry, no transition to the next topic...

In utero names. So I've named kiddo Gretel. I don't know why. I don't know if it's a girl or a boy yet, but Gretel just seemed like it fit. I tried a bunch of meaningless nouns, but nothing stuck like Gretel. My grandfather has called me Myrtle my entire life. Seriously. He has never, ever called me Ashley. And to me, Gretel and Myrtle sound similar, so maybe that has something to do with it. Kyle, on the other hand, has another name for Gretel....


Yes, Seven. If you are an avid Seinfeld watcher, you probably get it. Seinfeld is the only show (aside from sports) that Kyle has ever regularly watched. And thanks to syndication, he never has to stop. Seven is the name that George Costanza has picked out for his future children.

Okay, I think I've covered enough for today. But don't worry. I have an editorial calendar of sorts started on my iPhone notes, so I might actually be able to keep doing this regularly. We'll see how it goes:)  Oh, and all my love to Mallory for becoming my first follower. She didn't have a choice. She's the only one who knows about the blog right now:)

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

This could be a bad idea....

I'm not kidding. This could be a bad idea. One of two things will probably happen. Either I'm going to suck at this because a) I don't have anything interesting to say  b) I won't make the time to be a timely blogger and c) I've already decided I'm going to suck at this. OR - I'm going to be awesome, realize that I'm awesome and then completely neglect more important things (husband, laundry, weeding, etc.) because I'm here...typing because I have a distorted view of how important my thoughts are. But I've already invested too much time in making this thing look pretty, so we're doing this thing.

Now that I'm committed, allow me to cut to the chase. You're behind. That's not your fault. It's because I chose for you to be behind. Most of you are reading this post more than a week after it was originally posted. That's because I haven't let you in on my secret yet. But I will a week from today. You see, my inspiration for becoming a blogger comes from within. Literally. At this moment, you probably know me, but what you don't know is...I'm going to be a mom. That's right. Come February, I will be one of the bona fide mommy bloggers that I cherish and appreciate (personally and professionally speaking). So, I originally decided that I would blog about the experience. But I realized that not everything has to be baby-related. Oh, don't get me wrong. A lot of it will be, especially at first. But I promise to try (repeat, to try) not to drive you to the brink of insanity with baby stories. I have plenty of other interests, which I will share with you as we go along. Not today. As of this moment, I have probably spent two hours trying to make this thing look pretty, and being in the delicate condition I am in, I don't have the stamina to tell you the story behind baby's in utero names, my love of maternity pants (I will explain later) and why General Hospital is the greatest show on television. Yep. Greatest. That's what I said.